One belly and one question

Okay, so I've gotten to almost 19 weeks and have posted exactly one belly picture. Well, what can I say? Here's another one, taken at just over 18 weeks. I still find myself holding in my abdominal muscles. I try to force myself to relax, 'cause it's obviously not doing any good, but there's just something about a big ol' belly hanging out that makes me tighten those muscles. Am I just a freak, or does this happen to other people as well?

The question part of this post comes from my husband. I am fully aware that everything I am about to type is going to make me sound insane, but he asked me very nicely to pose this issue to my faithful readers, and I promised I would.

The thing is, we have a ticklish couch. It's true. If J tickles the couch around me, it makes me squirm and giggle. We thought it was just me, but when my stepdaughter was here for her Spring Break, she reacted the same way when he tickled the couch with both of us on it. She is now trying to blame me (apparently she thinks she had a bout of sympathetic giggling??), but I'm pretty sure it's the couch.

J also tried tickling my MIL's loveseat when my stepdaughter and I were seated on it, and it didn't have the same effect. So, clearly it's our couch. Right?

Now, the part he doesn't understand is, all three of us (my stepdaughter, J and I) can tickle my actual belly (in an attempt to tickle the babies' feet, of course), and that has no affect on me whatsoever.

I believe his question is, how is this possible? How is it possible that him tickling the couch I'm sitting on makes me collapse with laughter, but him tickling my actual belly does nothing but make me smile?

I don't have an answer for him. If he doesn't believe that the couch is ticklish, I don't know what I can do to convince him.

I'm still here

I know, you all probably thought I took these babies and ran away to Mexico to live on a beach somewhere. Well, I didn't. The truth of the matter is, life is just percolating along, and I haven't taken the time to write. Since we've chatted last, we've started painting the nursery, bought a couple of cribs, and started a kick-ass art project that I can't wait to share with you when it's a little closer to being done.

We've also hosted out-of-town company, watched a few good movies and a few bad movies, eaten KFC's Double Downs (yes, really) and gone to the Farmer's Market.

But none of that is what I want to talk about today. Part of the reason I feel I have so little to post about during this pregnancy is that I still haven't decided what it's like to feel pregnant. I'm hopefully halfway done (if twins can make it to at least 36 weeks, that's great!), and the fact that I'm actually, genuinely pregnant still hasn't sunk in.

And that's all due to our struggles with infertility. Nothing about getting pregnant, staying pregnant or having a child will ever be normal for us. It just won't. And that's okay, it's just making for a unique experience over here.

This is National Infertility Awareness Week. If you know someone going through it, please read this article. If you think you might know someone going through it, please read this article. If you might ever have any reason to spend 30 seconds in an elevator with someone going through it, please read this article.

Thank you. And everyone who has, will or does struggle with infertility will thank you.

My poor husband is grossly outnumbered

As of today it looks as though we are adding two little girls to our household! Combine that with me, J's teenage daughter and our girly dog, J just doesn't have a fighting chance.

We had a long anatomy scan today at 16w5d, and both babies look great. Baby A is now 6 oz. and Baby B is 5 oz. I know I'm completely biased, but they are the cutest little alien-looking thingies ever! It amazes me that the same two babies can be perfectly adorable in profile, and at the same time look like the Scream mask head-on. The technician assured me that that will correct itself before they arrive.

Fibroids are still there but not getting bigger (excellent news), and Baby A is partial previa, but the doc doesn't seem concerned at all. She's got plenty of time to move up and out of the way of the cervix.

When the technician tried to count fingers on Baby B's left hand, she decided to play patty cake just to make things difficult. I thought I was going to melt. We also watched her make sucking motions (or gossiping with her sister?). Baby A was the perfect angel this time, snuggled up to her sister.

It's official. I'm in love.

Tomorrow's the big day!

Well, one more big day in a line of many big days. We're going in at 16w5d for our next ultrasound. We were assured by several people at our last appointment that we would learn the sexes of the babies at this appointment, should they choose to cooperate. Personally, I'm not holding my breath. Of course I would love to find out, but we have yet to have an ultrasound where they're both cooperating at the same time, so I'm not sure why they would start now!

Most of all I'm hoping to see two healthy little avocados in there. (Oh yeah, we're in the week where they're the size of avocados. This has been a particularly amusing week as I've been eating avocados like they're going out of style, and I feel somewhat like a cannibal!) This is the longest we've gone without seeing them, and I hate how nervous I get before each scan.

I have started feeling some little blips and flips the last couple of days, so I'm hoping I'm finally feeling movement. It's still too sporadic to tell anything from it. I know I will look back on this and laugh at myself when they're playing soccer with my bladder and rib cage in a few short weeks, but right now I'm ready to be able to feel them and differentiate them on a regular basis.

We never splurged on a home doppler, so it will just be nice to have a daily affirmation that they're both still squirming around in there! Until then, we'll enjoy our ultrasound tomorrow and our next peek into their little world!

Can it be done?

I'm going to attempt to go through an entire pregnancy without setting foot in Babies 'R Us. It's not that I have anything specifically against the giant, baby megastore, I just have a vague distaste for it, and I can't even tell you why. Perhaps it reminds me of WalMart on some level – this giant monster that sucks up everyone's money.

Or perhaps it's a simple as the part of my personality that abhors being told what to do. I don't want to have to go to BRU just because that's what you do when you're having a baby.

I am lucky enough to have a Buy Buy Baby about 45 minutes away, so that will suffice as my big baby store. Cribs are coming from Ikea, and I heart Target in a way that's almost unnatural, so I think I can do this.

What do you think? Can a modern, American family actually have babies without involving BRU? I'll keep you updated on how we hold up.

Starting the nursery!

Okay, I admit 15 weeks is early to be starting the nursery. But given the fact that my MFM has told me to take it easy between weeks 20-32, I'm simply not going to wait. I know I have plenty of family and friends who would be more than willing to help (and I'm sure I will have to take them up on it at some point!), but the simple truth is that I want to do as much of it as I can myself.

The wallpaper for the accent wall was delivered last weekend, which means I can now pick the paint color. Which means I can clear stuff out and start painting! I will post a "before" picture this weekend. I'm going to have to wait on fabric choices until we know what we're having, but I think what I've got planned so far can sway for any possible combination: b/b, g/g or b/g.

We shall see!